they've all gone to look for america

Life is good when you have a friend snoring next to you. I love it when people visit.

Today was a remarkable day because I came up with a potentially functional plan for the next three years.  A couple days ago I realized summer is basically over and I have No Freaking Idea what I’m going to do when it is. Until now….! But I’m not going to share what it is until things are actually set in motion. But it’s exciting. Amazing. Educational. Awesome. Entertaining. Astonishing. Etcetera.

Okay, less future, more past! This is a blog, not a science-fiction novel. I can’t even be sure about the next five seconds. Why bother?

I spent last week at camp with No More Deaths. Going back in a few days (this is basically what my entire summer will consist of, with some bicycle and water adventures thrown in for good measure) but in the meantime I’m enjoying Tucson as much as I can without a job (abdicated), home (also abdicated), money (see: job), or a phone (unintentionally abdicated). At least I have internet! Who needs a house when you have a web?

Speaking of webs, various types of grass spiders make funnel webs that I’m pretty sure are TIME VORTEXES. Check it out. That’s some Alice in Wonderland-type stuff right there! I saw a lot of these in the desert this past week. MIT’s mascot is a beaver (yeah, snicker all you want) because they’re the engineers of nature. If beavers are the engineers, spiders are the architects (duh). I’d like to see what a grass spider on drugs would create.

Anyway, yes, the desert. People aren’t interested in hearing about spiderwebs and rainbow-cactus spotted hilltops and greywater-drinking javelinas when they find out you’ve been working with No More Deaths, I know. There are so many stories to tell, and so few. Personally, I had a pretty annoying week. I got stung by a bee (are stings supposed to itch?), slipped in a canyon and hurt my neck (I’m okay), perpetuated a case of heat rash due to lack of will power (scratch scratch scratch) and harassed by an obnoxious border patrol agent. I always take injury in the desert really badly – not because of the physical pain, but because I can’t help but think of the people out there who can’t stay back from hiking that day and make curry on a propane stove, sipping Gatorade and reading a book. When I try to express this, people always tell me that I shouldn’t feel bad about taking care of myself. It’s not guilt. It’s not guilt at all. It’s just…compassion, I guess. Compassion and empathy that I spend a lot of energy avoiding most of the time. When I’m physically hurt, my focus is thrown off and I get caught off-guard by my emotions.

God, why do I always get caught up talking about feelings on here? Lame.

I say there are many and few stories from out there because without asking someone directly, you can only speculate about their life. And sometimes it’s non-communicational speculation. The more I look at this picture of a sock I found on a migrant trail, the less qualified I feel about verbalizing anything about anyone’s experience crossing, before, during, or after (making an optomistic assumption).

This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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